As summer approaches and you begin to think about slowing down the pace (do you?), this might be the ideal time to take stock of your life to assess your health and well-being, and how you spend your time. Do you have enough of it left over to take care of yourself?

Take a piece of paper, jot down a heading called Present Commitments and list them. Don’t forget duties beyond work and home. Are you also committed to volunteer work? What about commitment to yourself? Are you ready to add your name to what is likely a long list in order to achieve work/life balance?

Do you feel overwhelmed, tired, and wonder how you manage to do it all? If so, go through each item on the list and decide which commitments you can drop. Do you think you are supposed to do all of these things? Who said so?

This is not about abandoning your responsibilities, but remembering your responsibility to your own needs – stress relief! It’s recognizing and honoring your limits so you can be the best you can be to your family, your work, your community and to yourself. Most of our ancestors worked many years to achieve what today’s generation wants immediately.

Six steps to combat overcommitment

1. Outline your priorities. You’ll want to keep most of your commitments, but even those you consider high priority can likely be pared down or some parts delegated. To improve health, from the remaining items in your list of present commitments, pick one obligation you can drop right away, or soon. And if you’re a perfectionist who tries to micro-manage the small things, resolve to loosen your perfectionist habits, or at least notice them.

2. Ask for help! For which tasks can you delegate all or part of the job? To prevent stress overload, consider the following: get someone to pick up the kids instead of your always doing it or get the family to help with cleaning up at home. Or, if you can, hire a cleaning lady or assign logical chores to family members – even kids! There will always be something to finish—that’s life. Take a break. Be kind to yourself.

3. Dissect one of your most stressful commitments. Your stress may come from a combination of all of your commitments. For now, just choose one that stands out in your mind. It could be your role as a caregiver to an aging parent, raising your children, your work, or your volunteer/community efforts. For a healthy balance, identify some specific, actionable strategies to help you manage, reduce or delegate your responsibilities in this area before you burn out. Caring for others is tricky business and requires careful balance. If you’re not caring for yourself, you may be compromising your ability to care for anyone else.

4. Turn your overnurturer button to ‘off’ mode – a great method to manage stress! Do friends ask for things that take up your time and cause you stress? Ask yourself if you really want to do the task requested of you. Often the same people will keep asking you to do things for them. They will stop asking if you say NO often enough. Don’t worry, they’ll find someone else to do it. You can tell them the truth—that you’re overburdened.  Overnurturers take on too much without giving it much thought. Learn that you cannot be everything to everyone. It is possible to harmonize your life and feel human again.

5. Practice saying NO. This week, practice saying NO to any new commitments instead of always being available. If the request is work-related, saying “No” may not work, but there are things you can say to a supervisor or boss if you’re already overwhelmed at work. For example: “If I take on this new project now, I may have to put aside projects # 1, 2, and 3.Which one has priority? What dates do you need all of them by?” It’s imperative to find ways to reduce chronic stress at work.

6. Practice saying YES to your own needs. Do something for yourself this next week, something you enjoy. Set aside at least 15 minutes a day to relax. Start treating yourself as well as you would treat others. Try some positive thinking; walk more slowly. Schedule a physical check-up with your health care practitioner if you are feeling particularly tired or down to be sure your symptoms don’t have physical origins.

Practice one or more of the six steps to combat overcommitment for critical stress reduction. You don’t have to fix everything at once. Choose one or two items on the list you feel you can work on and develop an action plan for them. For improved work/life balance, resolve this week to make at least one change. Know that you deserve this!

 You’re on your way!

Bravo! You’ve reviewed your stressors and decided to tend to your physical health. Know that you have made the first important steps to transform your life from frazzled to fantastic!

Rosalie Moscoe is a Registered Holistic Nutritionist who formerly taught stress management at CentennialCollege, Toronto. A popular international motivational speaker promoting stress relief and boosted nutrition for optimum well-being, Rosalie has been featured in publications including the National Post for her work on the frazzled lifestyle. She is the author of Frazzled Hurried Woman! Your Stress Relief Guide to Thriving…Not Merely Surviving. Learn more at www.healthinharmony.com.